Friday, 6 April 2012

If only shopping could mend a broken heart rather than just break the bank!

Well my dad's always said i only have two hobbies, shopping and spending money! This week i seemed to have done alot of that, i've shopped online and in the shops, i've spent money going out n having fun but i still feel empty! Yes i have 4 new pairs of ear-rings from New Look online, they were on buy one get one free, i also have a new pretty skirt and a cute turquioise satchel handbag.  I also have some new jewellery from work, this cute silver leaf set, that i wanted for a while n a silver bracelet n a cute little frog to go with the new maxi dress i have for work, just it's in the hands of my mum at the moment because it needs 10 inches off the bottom! Fits me perfect on top part just way too long as usual for this little shortie!! But i do love me maxi dresses just need sunshine to come back so i can wear it for work.  Although i have an engagement party to go on 21st so maybe i'll save it and wear it for that first then wear it after for work. I do love monsoon clothes when i like what i'm wearing, in the winter u just have to keep warm, but in summer, skirt n maxi dresses and i love them. 

So i was gonna be so good this month, i had worked out all my money and budget £50 a week to treat myself with, i've not really had extra money to treat myself with for a while so i thought it was about time.  My money budget run from Tues to Tues, i did well in my first week.  Actually still had £15 in the purse saved from night out on the saturday.  This week it all week out the window.  My new look stuff cost £28, my Monsoon stuff cost £27 and then i went to Next and bought a top n a canvas for my room and spent £24. I'm sure u can do the maths thats nearly £80 in just a couple of days! So my bank account no longer looks good for the new few weeks and having shopped i have new pretty things and they make me happy but they don't fix what's going on inside. 

On a good note, i think last few days my pain in little better, ive not been feeling painkillers wear off as much and not in much agony, its still there just not as painful.  I had a tickly cough last few days - nearly passed out in boots choking on the smell of perfumes, i was coughing so much it was horrible, i just wanted some bloody foundation! Oh n that cost like £9 too, i nearly fell for the whole 3 for 2 thing, but would had to spend more to get summat for free, so i talked myself out of it.  Just had the foundation.  So next week i'm so not spending money! I just want so much right now, i want this denim little jacket from work, its gonna cost £20 and then there some cute shorts too, all good investiment purchases, will come in handy for a holdiay n summer in general in uk if we get one! That week a few weeks ago, was so lovely i was able show me lovely tan off wearing a white vest top n my new little skirt from kids section, this weeks ive needed to wear it with leggings n cardigan and it so doesn't feel as cute!! lol

I am glad i'm little most the time, i like been cute and wearing cute little outfits.  I can't wait for the Abba night next week, i have my 70's outfit which is currently also in my mum's sewing pile, good job i have a mummy who can sew i'd be useless! The sewing genes didn't pass to me, my mum, nan and aunties can all sew, least i have lots of little helpers for my wardrobe.  The Abba outfit just needs a little adjustment on the shoulders, prob not the simpliest of jobs though wit the big flary sleeves.  I'm really excited bout wearing it though, i love dressing up, i'm not the biggest Abba fan, but i know all the songs and i'll be able to have a few drinks this time, i will so not be driving and i'll be off my antibiotics so it'll all be good.  It should be a really good night, if only i could sell tickets,  got given quite a few tickets to sell for it, which is hard work, i don't like asking people if they are coming to things to much, i've had enough of sending texts round and not getting a response, people can be so rude, i'd rather a sorry i don't to come than been ignored. 

You know in life there are some people u can rely on been there to support you and others u just got no chance.  Ive put my life and soul into fundraising and campaigning for the cf unit and all i want is a little support from the people around me, is that too much to ask.  Ive been telling people about it for months, but i don't ever push people for an answer on the spot.  I don't like to pressure people but i feel like my friends etc should want to come to support me.  Is that wrong.  I'll go anywhere, do anything i'm always up for doing things, having fun and supporting people as long as i'm well enough, but people don't do same for me, makes you wonder why i bother some times.  In fact it makes me want to become a hard faced cowbag that just does what i want n not try to do what others want or try make other people happy anymore. 

It's kinda like the sponsorship for my skydive, i don't have much spare money, but i always try to sponsor people around me and on facebook who are trying to do something good, although this month i did have a little extra, i don't have bills to pay anymore now i moved out of my house so decided to treat myself a little, nowt wrong with that, but normally, i'll go without something to be kind to others and sponsor them, complete strangers have been so kind to me and yet there are people who i would hope i wouldn't actually need to ask just don't say or do anything about it.  i hate asking will u sponsor me? oh thanks how much? it just feels so rude! how else am i gonna raise money though, i probably do people's head in posting things on my facebook but it's the only way i can do it.  i've hardly used a paper form because i just don't like asking people for money, i don't like asking people to sponsor me, buy raffle tickets or if they wanna come the abba night, because i know how precious people's money is to them. 

I'm not in a great mood tonight, i kinda needed a rant, i don't mean to offend or upset people, i just needed to get things off my chest and this is my blog and what i use it for.  Quite honestly, i'm tired n grumpy n miss my husband like crazy, i havent seen him for two weeks now, we're still friends and we text, guess we both been busy, but i just miss him.  I'm used to seeing him everyday and not seeing him for so long i just miss his company.  I know we're prob never getting back together but i want to be friends and i think as we've been living together for last year or so as friends that been friends now shouldnt be too hard! I think it's been part of the reason i've shopping this week, to try n ease the pain of not seeing him.  I know i can see him if i want to it not that i can't, it's just i know he's busy and so i've tried to keep busy too.  Prob why i'm worn out today n needed a lazy day.

So i think it's time for an early night after my very boring friday sat on the sofa, i've even been watching the golf with my bro, now i need to go drink lots of water and rehydrate myself, my mouth is so dry from been on three antibiotics and getting bad thrush on tongue so my nystatin is becoming my best friend and the boric acid second round of medication is about to come out the cupboard too! Don't ya just love thrush! For those of you on constant antibiotics u prob know exactly what i'm talking about.  Great fun! xx Anyway bed time.

Night night world! Sleep tight! :) xx love a sleepy, grumpy and a little dopey little miss (3 of the seven drawfs tonight).

Hopefully i'll find my happy positive self again for my next blog xx Bare with me!!

:) thank u for reading xxx

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